The Air is Frigid

I’m trapped inside white walls

Where pictures could hang

Of smiling faces and school pictures

Of my growing son

Though I’ve never taken the hammer

And nail to the drywall of my apartment

So my walls lay bare

And I’m stuck inside staring 

At the emptiness of my life

Wondering if I ever made the conscious 

Choice to isolate myself

Or if I’ve always been a loner by right

No phone calls, unless you count my sister

And my mother

One calls because she loves me and

The latter because she misses my son’s laughter

I’m without a friend

If you don’t count my cousins

In times of disaster

When the family comes together

To support me when I find myself off balance 

And I truly wish I lived closer to 

My sister and her soon to be husband

Because their home is filled with laughter

I would be a bandit master

Coming over just to steal a piece of peace

Cuddling with their dogs 

And smoking their pot when it is offered

Instead I’m shuttered in

My home without an animal

And I don’t smoke…so good times

Aren’t rolled into the perfect size

Inhaled through the heart and exhaled with a smile

Blinds drawn because the sunlight 

Lies and beckons you outside 

When the air is frigid

And this is the kind of shit

That makes me ache for the day

I move out of Michigan

But for now, I’m stuck in this position,

This disposition

I’m laying here on my couch

Wishing for a reason to write

So I write about how it’s cold outside

And my walls are frigid.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s